I’d definitely crack in seconds

November 4, 2007

I was watching a documentary earlier, it featured footage from police interviews. I always wonder what I’d do in that situation when I see things like that – I don’t mean if I’d committed a crime, I mean if I was innocent and being interrogated by the police. I’ve come to the conclusion that I’d break pretty early on in the interview – I’m thinking about a second after the detective says he’s starting it. Then I imagine hours of me admitting to anything they put to me and anything else that came in to my head. I’m not sure I handle pressure all that well.

I often think about alibis, there’s plenty of times I don’t have one. I think that’s why the people that get arrested initially for murders are always referred to as “loners” by their neighbours or the police. If you don’t know anyone then you’ve got no alibi. I think I might start taking my photo with passing strangers next time I’m out alone and feel the need for an alibi.

Once they charged me with murdering JFK, or whatever it was I admitted to in my tear filled interview, I’d be off to prison. I’ve often worried about what would happen to me in prison, which considering I don’t plan on committing any crimes any time soon is probably a pointless worry, although I think I always imagine that I’ll be sent in on a technicality – looking at a judge funny in the street or something. I’d be someone’s bitch within seconds of walking through the door. I’d probably seek out someone and beg them to let me be their bitch. That’s pretty pathetic, but I don’t see me reacting any other way. Fuck, I hope I don’t get forced into a gang and have to kill someone in the showers.


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